Hi guys! I have been gone for the last three weeks and I wanted to talk about why. I will begin by saying that this is my last semester of classes at uni, I still have to do a 6 month intership and I need to finish my thesis, so I have one semester left after I finish this one in around three weeks. Having said that, one of the main reasons I haven’t been posting that much is because I’m turning in papers for the six courses that I’m currently taking, I have been doing prep for interviwes and I have been working on my thesis.
Well, that’s not actually the reason why. Having so much to do and everything being so urgent made my anxiety so bad that I haven’t sleeping, I have been worring non-stop, I have not been eating that much at times and binge eating at other times, I have been restless, I have been crying a lot, my back has been hurting so much, my chronic digestive problems have been out of control and so many other things. What I’m trying to say is that my anxiety has been terrible.
In the middle of april, my ‘solution’ for my anxiety was reading. I know that doesn’t seem so bad! But I was reading books and that made me forget for a little bit and allowed me to ignore a lot of the pressure and most of my responsabilities. The problem was that the fact that I was ignoring that responsabilities didn’t not mean that they disappered. So after two weeks or almost three of ignoring everything, I have spent the last two weeks trying to catch up with everything, which means I have spent two weeks where my anxiety has been so bad that I can barely function and do everything I have to do.
The good news is that I have officially catched up with uni stuff, I went to an interview for an intership that I really want to get last week and it went great (please send me good vibes, they let me know on monday if I got it or not!) and I’m slowly advancing on my thesis (which is better than not advancing at all). I have been doing some things that help with my anxiety like yoga and writing a lot of list and even if it has been terrible, I managed to survive the last couple of days.
So, what does this mean for the blog? Well, I do have finals for the next two weeks. My last finals! Which is exciting even if I want to be done with them. But I feel better and I’m gonna start posting again because I miss it a lot. Actually, I have written this post in my mind a few times, but I haven’t been up to actually typing it thanks to my anxiety and the one time I actually tried to write this, I saw that my last post was published so long ago and that made my feel awful and suddenly I couldn’t bring myself to writing it. I’m so happy of finally writing this!
Thanks for reading it! I know it’s not book related but I just wanted to share this with you guys.